Sunday, December 27, 2009

Mrs. Claus

I have come to the realization that Mrs. Claus does not get HALF the recognition/praise/love she honestly deserves...because in this house, I am pretty sure she did most of the work!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Kid Talk

Sweetums and Little Man were playing with one of our nativity sets. They were mimicking travel time, sleep, and good/bad men. After a good 20 minutes of play, Sweetums noticed that Jesus was not in the manger where she had laid him. She quietly said, "Hey, where did Jesus go?"
Mr. KIR's smart-alec self quipped, "He's been resurrected."

                            Crickets Chirped. Eyes Blinked.

Then play resumed as LM replied,  "I don't know, maybe Momo ate him."

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Labels Smables

I am an organize freak! I label everything vinyl will stick to: the bathroom cabinets, kids clothing drawers, storage room items, garage, toy bins, craft room drawers, laundry baskets...you get the idea. I have even gone so far as to label:
Yes those are my fridge shelves. It is great when the kids are helping me with dinner or have to set/clear the table!

I have however, withstood many a taunt about the silliness of this--from friends mostly. (Crazy right...!) Why only friends? Mr. KIR's family is WAY to nice to tease, and my family lives so FAR, FAR away they rarely get to see my weirdness in all it's glory.

But alas, my brother and his family (along with one of my sisters sons--love you Jeremy,) came for a fantastical Thanksgiving trip. It was so great to have them all here! We miss them and their silly selves. My brother and his wifey are HILARIOUS--if you don't think so, just ask them! They crack each other up all the time. (Okay--they crack me up too:)

But my little bother...I mean brother...took mocking me to a whole new level this trip. One afternoon I came downstairs to this: (Along with snickers from his peanut gallery--yes this means YOU JU!)
He had labeled my house...Oh so funny!

But then, later that day when he was making bread...he had the GAUL to ask, "Jack, where do you keep the yeast?"

Hmmm...
Whose laughing NOW PEEEDGE? Oh and by the way- after you left- Pony Girl was helping with lunch and could not find the jam. So next time you visit, put things where they are labeled to go please:)

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Funnies

Found this quote on my friends facebook and giggled. SO, I share!



"Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.. If you give her a smile, she'll ...give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of @#%*."

Sunday, November 15, 2009

It Was MINE!

The kids got these little cut out service leaves at church a few weeks back. They are suppose to do secret acts of service and leave the leaf at the spot for the served person to find. Then in turn, the served, passes on the act of kindness.

One morning Little Man and I "leaved service" by taking a neighbor lunch. We of course
got him some as well and a yummy, divine, creamy, smooth, chocolate milk for me. Mmmmm, I am thirsty just thinking about the yumminess that is chocolate milk.

We came home and I drank one swig of my milk, put it in the fridge, and went to the basement. Little Man was content upstairs with his lunch and very own chocolate milk.

A bit later LM came downstairs with a gleam in his cute little eyes and informed me, "Mom, I did something nice just for you!"

"You did?" I gushed, "What did do do for me?"

LM: "I just drank your chocolate milk."

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Flu

Sweetums is S I C K! So sick in fact that she missed the trunk or treat last night and woke up this morning whimpering quietly to me, "Mom, I cannot go trick or treating, I am way to sick." Then she promptly laid her HOT head down and went back to sleep. I can honestly say it has been a LOOOONG time since anyone in our house has been this sick.

So as I was cleaning I noticed this:

So...do you think it would okay if I bathed her with these?

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

She does love me

Yesterday my kids missed the bus. If you know our family at all, this is a fluke. We are morning people and always bright and cheery the second the rooster crows. (Okay, okay, not really. I thought you all needed a good eye roll today...your welcome.)

So, the kids missed the bus. Surprising since there was much yelling and rushing on my part. Too bad there was only slowness and mouthy-ness on the second part of the equation... did I just type that out loud...eee gads.


Usually when the bus is missed, I drop Pony Girl off at another bus stop (which happens to be another bus all together) and take Sweetums to her schools front door. Nice mom huh! Now, why does PG not get the front door treatment? Simple, her school is far, far away! I mean it is a good 10 minutes from our house, and the other bus stop is in front of Sweetums school.

She HATES it! HATES it! That bus is crowded and she doesn't really know anyone on it, so it makes her very nervous and uncomfortable. But yesterday, she asked oh so nicely if I would please take her to school. I love her, so I relented. And because truth be told, I got up late (okay, I do EVERY stinking morning) and this fact does not aid in the "get ready on time for the bus" factor.

On the way, I jokingly said, "PG, you owe me BIG TIME for driving all the way across our large town to take you to school." She said, and I quote..."I love you mom. Isn't that enough?"

I about died. YES INDEEDY.

Did you know that when
girls begin the ever wonderful process of hormonal changes, the kind words of love go unsaid for months at a time and yelling and mean and nasty words take its place? I did. So the simple words brought tears to my eyes, enough to make me shut my mouth and loose my train of driving thought, enough to about wreck and kill us all-as well as our good friends. Which caused their 9 yr old daughter to exclaim, "Is that Jackie? What in the world is she doing?" as I turned down a wrong road and then quickly pulled out in front of them head-on...yep caught me that off guard.

So Pony Girl, "Yes my sweet, that IS enough. I love you, too." (Enough to die obviously--but I shall leave that tidbit unsaid:)

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Kid Talk

Sweetums: "Mom, I don't ever want to have kids. I only want to have a dog and a cat and some fish."
Me: "Why? I love being a mommy."
Sweetums: "Because I don't want them to come out of my tummy."
Pony Girl: "You could just adopt."
Me: "Did you know so and so are trying to adopt."
PG: "Ahhh, I hope they get a cute little girl or boy."

(Me too honey...me too!)
and if that were not funny enough in and of itself, the conversation went on...

Sweetums: "Okay, I will adopt."
Me: "How many will you adopt?"
Sweetums: "As many as I need."
Me: "How many is that?
Sweetums: "About 2,000."
Me: "Wow, why so many?"
PG: "To do chores."

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Tidbits

My sister in law did not read my blog for most of its existence, even though I started it to keep updated with them and my sister (who still never reads it.) Humph!!

Then one miraculous day she discovered the hilariousness that is my life, and now finds humor in my existence and shares a good giggle about me with my nieces and nephew. Yesterday she informed me that she needs an update. Humph!!

However, two of my dearest friends have convinced me to do a craft booth with them this next weekend, my husband has fled the country again, I had two birthday party's this weekend to host/attend, I was in charge of the combined youth activity for the youth program in our church last week, I taught a lesson on Sunday, I volunteer at one of the schools, and I am still the mother of three who insist on being fed and clothed in clean attire. So, I am swamped. I shall say it again...S.W.A.M.P.E.D. In fact, I mentioned the overwhelmed fact to Mr. KIR and he said, "Overwhelmed? Like you mean you have been underwhelmed, or just whelmed in the past?"

Where did this man get his humor genes from? A preschool gene pool? Shesh!

So these 3 little tidbits are all I got: Enjoy Ju!

1)What does an overwhelmed mom do when her Sweetums puts on pants she got from dear friends two years ago, (thank you Pam and Kara...we miss you!), but were HUGE then so she had to look at them longingly hanging in her closet and wait and wait and wait. Now that the waiting is over they look like this:
(High water city! The picture does not do it justice! Trust me though, HIGH WATERS!)

I'll tell you: She will kindly mention the fact to Sweetums. Then when said Sweetums informs her that she still wants to wear them, that she LOVES them and can't make it through the school day without them, she lets her wear them. Yes indeed-y she does.

2) Pony Girl got a Bill Nye recycle kit for her birthday and we whipped it out last night and began the rigorous process of making paper. When I had a question about some of the "not so clear" instructions, PG says, "Just ask Bill."
"What?" I inquire.
"Ask Bill...he is the science guy you know."
Smart Alec!

and

3)Little Man has been singing this little ditty lately:

" If your happy in your nose clap your hands... If your happy in your nose stomp your feet..."

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Kid Talk

Sweetums: (said in a LOUD sing-songy voice) "Today is going to be a great day!"
Little Man: "Why? Where are we going?"
Sweetums: (again--sing-songy) "Nowhere, its conference time. We get to stay home from church today."

Pony Girl: "Sweetums, you know conference is awful, right?"

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Nothing like a 4 yr old to keep your self esteem in check!

Yesterday I got a bit gussied up. (Just to be clear, "gussied up" in my world means I put on more make-up than mascara/eye liner, and a fancier than normal t-shirt.) It was a bit chilly so I threw on my fancy jacket for good measure. Now this jacket is amazing. I love the thing. It is sleek, black, and makes me feel like all that. It flairs at the wrists and curves into my "so-called" waist, accentuating all that once was of my girlish figure. Needless to say, I was feelin' fancy. I slipped on a pair of non flip flops (amazing, I know) and informed little man that time was of the essence, this beauty was not gonna last-- we'd best get out the door. He looked at me and stated, " Mom, you look UGLY, that jacket is HID-E-OUS!"

Thank you my offspring, Thank You.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Little Man thoughts

Next door, this has been going on all morning.


Little Man has been faithfully watching from here:

When I asked him how it was going, he informed me, "The big tractor is digging for worms, Mom."

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Album needed



I love three reality shows--just three. Does that make me a junkie?
Mr. KIR would like to know if there is there a twelve-step program available. (AS IF--like I'd take it!)

My problems...I mean favorites are:
(in no particular order)
The Biggest Loser (did you see this newest one? There is a contestant who put weight on after she lost her hubby, 5 yr. old daughter and 2 1/2 week old son 2 yrs ago to a reckless driver-going over 100 miles an hour? Sad!)
American Idol
and the one this post comes from-
America's got talent.

This guy--Drew Stevyns--was deemed a "not so talented" by the judges for the first few rounds.(We never even got to see his audition/first song.) But after the 40 finalists were chosen, Simon Cowell told them they needed to bring a few talents back--Drew was one of them. Thank Goodness! He ended up coming in third place--AWESOME!! I LOVE HIS VOICE!

Problem is, I can only find one song to download. I have been listening to it OVER and OVER and OVER.

Will someone
PLEASE sign the guy and make an album already. MR. KIR is about ready to trash any speakers that come within two feet of me. And we all know that is not a good idea...hey, is there a twelve step program for anger management?

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Self Esteem boosters...Oh Wait...

Two events recently that have seriously wounded my ego--that is E G O...

1. Mr. KIR was out of the country again for 9 stinking days! So, when he returned home late Friday night, I immediately went shopping with a girlfriend early Saturday morning. Good for the soul..right? I know! Now before I continue, I just want to state for the record (which record, I have no idea) that even though I am 37 years old, happily married to mr. handsome himself, the mother of three adorable kids, the event happened at a Goodwill, and the men were weird-o's, it still stung. Yes it did, I tell ya!

See, my friend is beautiful--not in the "Oh, she is so sweet--beautiful," but G O R G E O U S--even though she is like 700 years older than me (okay, maybe just a few years. ) She is also happily married and the mother of three adorable babies, PLUS, she gets to call me friend--dang her...some people have it all!

Anyway, we were shopping away at the goodwill looking for treasures to transform, and these two guys were also shopping. I passed them like 12 times. I thought nothing of it/them until I found mrs. gorgeous and she says, "Those two guys asked me some lame question about a party...and when I told them, 'No party,' they just kept talking to me and bugging the bajjeeebas out of me."

AHHHH, I am so sorry you pretty little princess, that even though you are like 900 years old, wearing a wedding ring and with your OH SO GORGEOUS friend, guys still hit on you. (Spit raspberries loudly here please.)

And 2. THIS...




My passport photo.



I think I may just stay in the country forever.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Pony Girls letter

Pony Girl brought this home:

It melted my heart... UNTIL I got to the "Other people do not think you are the best..." part.

WHAT? Who has she been talking to?

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

What?

I heard all these silly noises and talking. I went to to find Little Man and inquired, "Little Man, what are you doing?"

Little Man: "Making a title sequence."

WHAT?!? I don't even know what that means! Sad, I think my 3 year old is smarter than me!

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Kid Talk

Sweetums: "Dad, I really want a new Carrie Underwear CD."

Sweetums (put on huffy voice and grumpy undertones): "Mom, why do we have to do so many chores?"
Pony Girl: "So we don't end up on Clean House."

Little Man: "I am going to Texas tomorrow."
Mr. KIR: "You are? Are you going to fly or drive?"
LM: "I don't have a car to fly in."
Mr. KIR: "Are you going to ride your bike?"
LM: "Dad, I can't ride my bike on the road!"
Mr. KIR: "Are you going to walk?"
LM: "No."
Mr. KIR: "Well, then how are you going to get there?"
LM: "I'm going to drive my green tractor with the trailer on the back. They can go on the road, right?"

Monday, August 17, 2009

Bikini Brownies

I made some yummy zucchini brownies and asked Little Man if he wanted some. His reply: "I like the brownies mom, but not the bikini's in them."

Friday, August 14, 2009

Me cry? The SECOND day of school?

School started yesterday. My girls were NERVOUS!

Sweetums was a slow riser and a very heavy/dead weight object to drag into the building/classroom, but drag I did. I stayed for about ten minutes--much to the teachers dismay but Sweetums delight. (And yes, I was a very aware of the teachers get out of my room looks, but when Sweetums needs me, no look will deter this mother bear! SO look away Mr. Teacher man, look away!)

Pony girl was next to be dropped off. Oh, I'm sorry did I say drop off? What I meant to say was, park my humongous vehicle in the CRAZY psychotic mess of parents pulling up and dropping off and then screeching out of the joint, faculty everywhere telling us where to go and where we COULD NOT go, buses skidding to halts and depositing critters for miles, loud kids EVERYWHERE running hither and thither, orange coned mess. I unbuckled Little man and we happily escorted PG into the building. And YES, I was the ONLY parent in there. And YES, I walked across the entire specifically routed, roped off gym full of before mentioned children/faculty to get to the 4th grade section. And YES, I climbed 40 flights of bleacher steps to sit with my child who insisted on it. And YES, I stood up not two seconds after I sat down as she now had two girlfriends by her and announced that I could depart--which then caused me to have to climb back down the 40 steps, across the roped off section in front of the entire student population, and walk directly in front of the now talking principle, all the while hauling a smiling Little Man along for the experience.WHY? Because my little girl needed me and I was more than happy to oblige!

I went through an all to similar experience during pick-up time. But as I said before. I would do it again if it comforts my girls. Their peace is so worth it!

Today they were both still nervous and wanted me to walk them in. Sweetums' went off without a hitch. PG's on the other hand. Well, it made me cry.

I think PG school drop-off scene is a well functioning mess -- for the experienced-- but for the newbie, not so much. The roads around the school are roped/coned off to aid in the drop off process. The actual car line starts about three blocks away from the actual school doors, and they are in no way letting you in if you for some unknown reason get past the cones on a side street. It is difficult to navigate around and a messy hunt for a parking spot within walking distance. But this morning I got a brilliant idea, I would park and instead of walking her in the front, I would walk her through the side/back doors she would go through if (when) I convince her to ride the bus. Great right? So I drove around the roped off streets, found a great spot on a rather quiet street...so very close to the havoc ridden drop-off scene up front, and parked. This maybe should have warned me of the upcoming trouble...but it did not, I was simply thinking, "I have found the gem of a drop-off spot." Now you may be asking, Mrs. KIR, no one in the 50 bazillion years of the school being open has ever found this treasure? Just you? Don't you think that is odd?" Nope, I did not. So it stands to reason that when we were immediately stopped by two very nice faculty members, I was taken aback. They promptly informed us that drop-off was not allowed in this area--this was strictly a bus zone and cars were not allowed in here. They were so nice about it I simply ho-hummed away. So why did I start crying immediately upon re-entering my vehicle?

Because PG was TICKED! I am talking, walked ahead of me, cussing under her breath about "embarrassing" and "had to do that", and "why can't I just"...MAD! She did not turn to look at me or say goodbye as I deposited her so lovingly in the gym. I walked back to my imperfect parking spot, buckled LM and cried.

I know, I am a wimp, and in serious trouble when teen years hit. I know!

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Case of the mistaken beer

While at the in-laws house, Little Man asked if he could have a soda. I, being the mom ever conscience of health and such, said, "Yes."
He came back with this:I stifled a giggle and informed him that he brought in beer and could not have such a thing.

He left and brought back this:I again mentioned beer and added a tidbit of legal drinking age info. He looked at me and asked, "Well, what CAN I have?"

So I went to the fridge, grabbed the first can of soda I saw and handed it to him. It was this.

I said, "Here kiddo, have a root beer."

Sadly, it took me a minute to figure out why he looked at me with a quizzical, furrowed brow kind of look and asked, "I can have THIS beer?"

Giggle. Gigggggle. Snort. Yep my little man, that beer is okay.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Another Hole? really?

You may be asking yourself, “WHY is she sitting there, taking pictures no less, of Sweetums and Little Man digging ANOTHER hole?”

It’s a sad story really.

See, Pony Girl went to the local county fair.
That is not the sad part...hillbilly-ish yes, but not sad.

She paid $93.00 to play a throw the ping pong ball at three bowls with openings the size of quarters. And if said thrower is lucky enough to get a ball into the bowl, they are the proud winner of a 3 cent gold fish that has been floating helplessly in a ziplock bag of water for two days...most likely without food during said time.

And she won.
Also not the sad part..AMAZING, but not sad.

(That part happens to remind me of the time I gave her 50 cents at Walmart to get candy/junk from the quarter machines that are now 50 cent machines. She asked to play the machine you put your 50 cents into and maneuver a rigged claw to haphazardly grab at junky stuffed animal made in china. You know the "games" that really just get hopes up as the players watch it loosely grab the ear of the animal next to the one they wanted and then crush said hopes when the claw slips carelessly off the prized lost creature, causing tears of misery to said player and then in turn, annoyance to the mother who let them play it in the first place. I of course, gave her the gentle- but firm-talk about “rip offs” and “nothing for something” talk. I also mentioned that it was her choice but the 50 cents was the only money I was giving her. (I’m such a good parent that way.) She promptly ignored me and played anyway. She of course won.)

(Which then reminds me of the time I was a teenager on a road trip with my dad. He was lecturing me on the evils of the “nothing for something” lottery. So I bought a ticket just to tick him off -- and won. Ahhh, good times, good times.)


But I digress...

So, she won this poor little gold fish. She promptly named him Fuego and loved him with all her 9 year old heart–which if you aren’t sure what I am talking about, means : she started at promptly 10:00pm, (the second she walked in the door,) BEGGING whining-ly to keep him in his own private tank in her room because he is just so special. Then, when that didn’t work, she grumpily put him in the family tank and mooned over him until we, the parents of the house/fish tank, threatened to put Fuego in the ivory tank we own so he could rejoin Nemo - unless she got ready for bed immediately. She did... only to sneak out of her room 20 to 30 times that night just to get reminded of the ivory tank we own... (at which she promtly went a runnin’.) The following morning, she awoke rushing to Fuego’s watery home. The ohhhing and ahhhing, bragging, and making younger siblings all over the world cry over their lack of cheap fish ownership begin instantly.

That is not the sad part either..

This however is: He died.

Surprising–I know! I myself was shocked.
But not as shocked as Pony Girl. She was devastated. Oceans were cried. The drought was declared over and flood warnings were spread far and wide. Which in turn caused Sweetums to cry over Freddy, her beloved fish that died a good 9 months ago. Which then caused Little Man to cry because he has never owned a fish that could have died and could have given him the opportunity to cry over. Which then caused one mom to allow two children hole digging privileges.

The funeral was well attended and documented. Fuego was buried near his beloved cousin Freddy. (Well half of his cousin as when the mom of the house helped dig the hole she may have accidentily cut Freddy in half with the shovel...but that is neither here nor there.)



Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Ho Hum

Life's been pretty boring lately. That's a good thing...right?

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Sweetum-isms

1) We traveled a short distance this weekend to visit with some friends (Marci, Ashley, Rachel and their kids.) The first day we went to a great pool and the kids had a blast! However, as we were leaving, Sweetums got her foot caught under one of the doors–O.U.C.H. Blood and screams were all over the joint! Marci grabbed her towel and wrapped the gushing foot (what a sacrifice girl–THANK YOU) while I ran to get supplies to clean and bandage her up.

Today, while we were working on preparing the wounds for tennis/swimming. She says, “Mom, if Marci was my mom, she probably might not have let my foot get hurt.”

Apparently Marci is a much better “safe keeping” kind of mom! WAIT A MINUTE–on second thought...Marci what did you say to my kid when I, the germ-a-phobe, was sprinting barefoot down the dangerously wet, slippery, and disgusting linoleum floor seemingly three blocks to the front desk/check in area to grab the first aid kit?

AND

2) Rachel has three kids who are exactly the same ages as ours: Pony Girl and Eli / Sweetums and Sophie / Little Man and Simeon. It makes for GREAT play dates and has since our friendship began when PG and Eli were little babes. Sweetums and Sophie have an especially close friendship, the kind that makes my heart swell with tenderness whenever I see or think about them. Sweetums feels the same way and often wishes aloud that Sophie was her sister. This weekend she came up with what she thought was the ultimate of perfect plans: “Mom do you think Rachel would trade Little Man for Sophie? Then Simeon and Little Man could be brothers and Sophie could finally come live with us!”

“Hmmm, let’s see what his behavior is like today first okay girl:)”

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Trip costs

Large bag of junk food, 5 water bottles refilled multiple times, 2 Nintendo DS systems, one Leapster, 3 computers, one DVD player with 25 movies, two cell phones, 27 hours of driving spread out over three days, enough stops at McDonald's to make even the most adamant fans stomach hurl, 15 potty breaks, sleeping in two semi okay hotels and one night in a disgusting make my skin crawl to walk in let alone not sleep but lay awake all night trying not to touch or think about my kids touching anything cabin, 3 custom sized and handmade walking sticks, an entrance fee to the Grand Canyon, and a ginormous amount of money on souvenirs: 3 Bazillion Dollars

Taking the kids to the gift shop immediately upon arrival: two meltdowns and 1 bazillion more dollars.

Forcing the kids to take at least the 1/4 mile hike (one trip around the track) to actually see the GRAND CANYON and having them cry and say things like, "I am so tired, I am going to die, my legs hurt boohooobooobooo." The entire 15 minute walk causing EVERYONE to stare and three strangers to offer to carry them up the hill to the car: 2 embarrassed parents.

Getting back in the car to drive away after being there for literally 30 minutes, two VERY disgruntled parents and asking the oldest to say a prayer for our drive and hearing her say, "And thank you for this awesome vacation we are having....": PRICELESS

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Travel notes

As we, the KIR family, have just embarked on our first ever DRIVE across the country, I have learned a few things in the 18 hours we have been trapped in an unusually small Ford Expedition. (I would simply make a "mental" mental note of these precious tidbits, but let’s face it, my memory is not what it used to be. So without further adieu:)

Travel Mental Notes to Self:
1) Be grateful -very grateful- that the youngest potty goer in our family is a boy. (Yes, I said it...EEE GADS!)
2) But now that the youngest potty goer is accustomed to the great outdoors, make sure to have lessons/consequences befitting this behavior ready when we get home as this blessed gift is not going to be needed anymore, and may cause some undue frustration.
3) Remember, oh please remember to tell the kids before sending them into the hotel shower NOT to set their clothes on the toilet or their jammies on the yucky floor. Then pack extra in the small hotel bag for when you discover they have forgotten, so you don’t have to get out the HUGEMONGOUS luggage stuffed in the back under all the “to drive” junk.
4) Remember that personal nirvana can be attained by telling everyone to pack any music they want to listen to for our 24+ hour drive and then be the only one to really do it.
5) Remember to forget to pack any shoes except your pool flip flops, which you were only wearing to load the car, so you can go shoe shopping immediately upon arrival of destination.
6) When you get a new surprise video for the kids to watch in the car, make sure it is not some weird half show video that is only 12 stinking minutes!
7) Remember to remind Mr. KIR that if he mentions even one more stinking lake/river/pond that the kids have never seen before I will hurt him – as Pony Girl will most definitely BEG me to take a picture of it as we pass it and yet won’t remember or ask to see it again until I have deleted it 3 months after she requested I take it, and then get very mad that I would do such a thing.
8) Remember if I buy transformers for Little Man and the box says level 2/3 what they really mean is you need a PHD in engineering with a strong auto cad and solid works background.
9) Remember when the girls tell you they want Little Man to sit in the back (3rd row) and promise to buckle/unbuckle him so you don't have to crawl all the way back there, what they really mean is: we will each buckle him once and then complain when you ask us to unbuckle him and then seriously refuse to do either the rest of the way, making you want to leave them on the side of the road , causing one potty accident and Mr. KIR to take over the crawl back there over all their junk to get the poor child out routine. (AND you cannot move LM up as HE would then have cause to be left by the side of the road in some unknown location...and frankly, it is not his fault.)

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Memories for the corner of my mind

Things this Mom doesn't want to forget:

1) (For-warning: take a good long brain breath as a run-on in the worst way is about to be read.) You know your little girl is growing up when a monsoon hits and goes on for a good 5 or 6 hours and Pony Girl who has been scared of thunderstorms most of her life and lives not only in the Thunderstorm Capital of the world, but also in a two story house with her bedroom being over the garage, and you go into her room to check on her when she doesn't come a screamin' into yours, and you find her sitting up in bed with just her lamp on reading.

Sigh
...sadness...my needed days are numbered.

2) Hannah Montana always says, "Sweet Nibblets."

Little Man always says, "Sweet Nibble Lips."

3) Mr. KIR, his sister and his dad walk EXACTLY the same. I have recently discovered that Sweetums has the same saunter. I LOVE IT!

Friday, June 12, 2009

Cooking skills needing overhaul?

Last night I made a favorite dinner: Chicken and Quinoa Salad. Oh, the yumminess that is quinoa, sesame oil, snow peas, and ginger...mmmmmm gooood!

After we ate, a girlfriend (who shall remain nameless...lynne...) came to pick me up for a shopping night. She walks in, sniffin' all the while stating, "There's a skunk somewhere...it stinks."

"It's dinner, " I state.

"No, it's a skunk. Do you smell that?"

"Uh, ya I do, it's dinner."

"No, it stinks, it's a skunk outside."

"It's dinner, come smell this. "

She walks over, sniffs the bowl and giggles. "Oh, ya it is...what is that, I recognize that smell..."

I kindly inform her that it is sesame oil. She then has the audacity to ask for the recipe-

...AS IF!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I think I may have had some B.O.

While Pony Girl has tennis, I walk with some girlfriends around the track. (It is kinda like the tortoise and two hares...me being the tortoise.) Yesterday when we got home I was a stinky mess, but wanted to immediately get the kids going on chores before the fun started and their work ethic left by way of the sandbox. Little Man was my shadow and followed, sat, and cleaned along with me. I then made lunch for the kiddos and went to shower - it being noon and all, I figured I might as well (I am on top of it like that!)

Later on I was sitting on the couch and LM came to sit by me. A few minutes into it I heard...

sniff, sniff
pause
snifffffffffff

"Did you actually SHOWER?"

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Bed Troubles

You know when your kids ask you for expensive things and you tell them maybe in a few years, and then a few days later you find them at a garage sale for $25.00 by accident and surprise them and they love it, but are a bit confused...and it's kinda sorta funny? Ya, me too.

A few months back I discussed with Mr. KIR that when it was time for Little Man to graduate from his toddler bed we should do some rearranging. I suggested maybe we should get us a new bed, give Pony Girl our queen and LM her twin. Then when guests come, they would have a nice comfy place to sleep. I did all this discussing in front of PG. Big mistake! Since then, she has asked and pestered, looked up beds on-line, and talked about "when" constantly. Last week I finally told her beds were expensive and to stop, we had decided to just get LM a twin and maybe in a few years we would get her a bigger bed. Discussion and bed search DONE!

So this weekend I found an awesome antique bed for Little Man. I brought it home, washed it up and set it up in his room. It turned out to be a double instead of a twin, so I gave it to PG. (Yes, I am that wonderful.) Even though we would have to buy a new mattress for it, she was excited!! And since I had sold LM's toddler bed at a garage sale the previous weekend, and he had been sleeping on the floor with his crib/toddler bed mattress all week, I promptly set up the new bed in PG's room and the twin in Little Man's. I did the whole, "LM look at your new bed, want to sleep on the big bed tonight...and for the rest of your 'at this house' life?" routine. I made a big deal about this and got rid of the toddler mattress. All with PG watching. She had been sleeping in her closet as she made it up to be a library and thought it was the best joint in the house, so I figured a few more days until I got to the mattress store would be no big deal. However, I forgot to mention this part to PG and suddenly she realized she was bed-less. The "library" didn't seem as cozy or exciting, and she asked to sleep with Little Man. She uncomfortably did this for two nights (Saturday and Sunday) and then came to me asking in a serious and concerned voice, "Mom, how much longer before you get me a mattress...like one or two years or something?"

I promptly told her "Yes" and walked away...

No, you sillies. I giggled, hugged her cute self, and told her we would buy it this week.

She promptly got on the computer and began looking for the perfect mattress...OH BROTHER!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Sweet Sweat Bands Man!

I love tennis!

I signed a reluctant child up last year and she loved it.

I signed a second reluctant child up this year. Being nervous and all, she informed me one night before bed, "Mom, I am scared of tennis because I don't know how to play."

I let her know that all the kids in her class would be beginners and the only way to learn is to start.

She looked at me with sincerely unbelieving eyes, and went to bed.

The next day I awoke to little miss Sweetums saying, "YEssssssssss!" under her breathe as the wii slammed away a tennis game. When it was over she triumphantly walked away and informed me that, SHE was ready. Practice was indeed a good thing and she was not scared any more.

Since then they have both been looking forward to lessons starting and have been adorning their tennis racquet's whenever I let them. Folks have heard... and last night a wonderful young women from our church gave the girls sweat bands. Sweetums was so excited and began wearing them immediately. I mentioned that maybe only the wrist bands were needed.

"NOPE! I like the headband Mom."

So today, I have taken pictures of the little sweat band wearer - for posterity sake.


Little Man had to get in on the sweat band action as well... whatever...

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Put your dishes away for CRYING out loud....

What happens when you tell your little boy he can't do this:


until he does this?


One hour and 20 minutes of this:
Apparently taking off the swim trunks is suppose to punish me. Three year old thinking is the BEST!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Touch pad car entry please. Oh and why we are at it, how about home and garage codes as well.

From the very beginning of my marriage, I knew Mr. KIR was one in a million. AND why, why was I so lucky? I still have not figured it out. I just keep holding on and thinking one day--one day--the man is going to wake up and realize what he has gotten himself into and run for the hills, grabbing his sanity along the way. But until that happens, I shall hold on and worship the ground he walks on! (Seriously! If you know him-and me-you believe!)

Long story short, I locked my keys in the car...again... 30 minutes from our house...at 10:45pm...

I called Mr. KIR and announced my blunder. He simple said, "Okay, I'll get the kids in the car and be there soon."

He pulled up next to where I was, handed me the keys, waited for me to unlock, and we headed home. When we got there (11:40 pm) he carried the kids back to bed, helped me unload the car and put stuff away.

NOT once did the man sigh or breathe out in frustration. NOT once did he act upset or irritated. NOT once did his tone of voice change or his looks in my direction differ from his normal self.

The man is so amazing, so calm, so loving, and understanding. I shall never, NEVER, be worthy!

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Counting Dream Come True

This next post is not for the manner ridden. In fact it will go against the better judgment of most of you. However, if you know me at all, you know the "better judgment" gene does not run in the family of my upbringing, and has seriously skipped a generation from Mr. KIR's family when it comes to our kids, so I say: Read at your own risk.

When our girls were young, they were inundated with Baby Einstein and hours and hours of counting/ABC/color/nursery rhyme "Mommy and Me Music" classes. We listened to all sorts of kid-learning songs in the car, and attended play group after play group. I, being a former over achiever, also made 60 to 70 file folder games for their enjoyment, thousands of felt books/games, and puzzles were everywhere in our house.

Little Man is now three and a half years old and the "Prince" of our domain. Kids-learning music is a thing of the past in our vehicles as Hannah Montana, Kids Bop, and High School Musical reign supreme in girly KIR world. All the learning "stuff" I made is still around, but holds no interest for him, and puzzles are automatic missiles in his hands. I am too tired to go to Mommy and Me Music, and play groups are a thing of the past. Unfortunately, all of this has equaled neglect to the academia side of Little Man's upbringing.

Who cares, right?

Well, apparently I do. See, about two months ago I noticed he could not count, did not know his ABC's, and couldn't care less about color knowledge unless it had to do with green and a certain type of tractor-that shall remain nameless.

How embarrassing! I could not send my son off to college without proper color recognition. So I did what all Mother of the Year recipients do, I got out the big guns: Kids music was infiltrated throughout the car air-waves, I began counting over and over again, and playing the "copy me" game. I also began talking kid speak, "LM, hand me the YELLOW cup please, the YELLOW one..."

He caught on to colors, puzzles, and file games like a pro. However, numbers and ABC's--not happening. He flat out did not care.

Me (said in annoying high pitched sing-songy voice) (Oh and imagine a very uncoordinated, un-hip, jiggity-jig dance accompanying it): "123, 456, 789...... 10, let's do it again..."

LM (screeched out with giggles, and snorts of laughter immediately after): "125922650476503 poop."

...sigh...

But today...TODAY we had a break through:

LM: "Mom, do you know how many poops I went in the toilet?"

Me: "Little Man, that is gross, please don't talk like that."

LM (Ignoring me like a true, youngest, boy child): "1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 6 poops mom! Come see!"

I think I'll just put the guns away.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Suitcase Self-esteem

I have always known Mr. KIR had an amazing self concept and has never cared what others thought of him, and after this post you all will as well.

He is currently on a business trip to China. He has been gone an astonishingly long 8 days, and we have two more to go.

As he was getting ready for the trip, he began to pack and pile stuff up. When he went to the basement to get a suitcase he came upstairs with mine... " Ummmm, you are not seriously taking that are you?"

Folks--he did, and I have heard his fellow travelers were amused, embarrassed, and walked far, far ahead of him...

Did he care? NOPE...
Case of self concept questions--closed!


Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Kids Talk

I have been on the phone recently planning our vacation out west to visit family and the Grand Canyon. Little Man has of course been my little shadow. So after running errands yesterday I got a good giggle when he informed me that he was not going home now. He wanted some candy, so could I just go pick up Daddy, Pony Girl and Sweetums so we could make our way to the Gram Candyons now!

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Queen Mom

Today Little Man was playing with Littlest Pet Shop. He had a mommy, daddy, some kids, and a HUGE truck with lots of stuff. He stuffed all the pets and stuff into the truck and drove all over the house playing and talking as if they were on a drive. Suddenly he stopped and stated, "Mom, I need the mommy thing."

I of course had NO idea what he was talking about, to which he insisted, "You know, the mommy thing that goes on only mommy's heads!"

Still no clue from whiz mom here.

We traipsed downstairs and began the tedious search through all the LPS stuff. I thought I was in for it, but we found it quite quickly and boy was it worth it!! Little Man was looking for the CROWN!

Yes folks, my son believes mommy's wear crowns!

He won't be of marriageable age for 20 years, but girls, you may dream:)

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Fire Starter

When the youth of our church said they wanted a bonfire at the KIR house...I was all for it...they are great girls and I love their silliness. However, when Mr. KIR was not going to be home the night of the event, panic struck--how was little ol' me going to man a fire, entertain the girls, and watch my three little kids with chocolate, marshmallows and a HUGE roaring inferno in my yard?

Why you ask? It took me awhile, but now I realize that by being married to Mr. KIR, I have been warped.

See, Mr. KIR is a pyro...when a young lad, he and his friends would head to Bear Lake in Idaho and build HUGE fires on the beach---designing words/art and paths with lighter fluid! OH MY! When we got married it continued. (and even though I love you, I blame you, Mr. You're Killing Me Campbell). When we have bonfires in our back yard...they are HUGE sometimes so dang hot you have to put your chair miles away to even sit. Mr. KIR starts them a good 30 to 45 minutes before anyone arrives and strokes them caring-ly and lovingly. I am so used to this that I have forgotten any other way. So in my mind, I was not going to be capable of this type of care with all the other things going on. I needed someone else to help! So I enlisted the help of a capable young college student just back from school.

He arrived a few minutes before the girls and said, "Okay, what do we do?" Interesting...

I had him get the wood while I wadded up the newspaper and put it in the designated fire section. I then had to tell him to build a tee pee kind of thing with the wood and gave him the matches. Do you see where this is going?

He lit one match, and threw it in. It did not start. So I being Mr. KIR's wife through and through ask, "Do you need some lighter fluid?"

He didn't think so...hmmm, WHAT?

He pretty much walked away as one of the girls began talking. So, I gingerly lit the fire. (I used the ol' matches to a paper log idea and did not even need lighter fluid. I impressed myself, oh yes indeedy!)

Now, at this time "Mr. just returned from college, good looking, cute girls are here, young man" proceeded to interact with the lovely young girls and neglect the fire. I am talking TOTALLY ignored the thing. You heard me...he is NO PYRO!

The fire started to burn out so I put on a few bits of wood. A few...just little ones. I then was able to sit and actually enjoy the fire. I was able to sit close, admire the beauty of the ember redness. I watched my kids play and talked with a few of the not enthralled with "Mr. just returned from college, good looking, loving this attention, young man".

At one point I joked with "Mr. just returned from college, good looking, ignoring the fire, young man" saying , "Hey Fire Starter, your fire needs wood." Mostly so I would not have to get up and get the wood myself. I had to anyway--he was busy...young girls and all--hanging on his every move.....

When it was time to go, I went to get some stuff to help "Mr. just returned from college, good looking, busy with the girls, young man" put out the fire...BUT while I was gone (like ten seconds,) HE LEFT. I am NOT kidding..."Mr. just returned from college, good looking, has no fire sense, young man" left my house: fire going, grass all around, kids running in my yard LEFT. I quickly took stock of the fire and found my kids. I then proceeded with the other adult lady there, to douse the fire and mull around the embers. It was simple. I actually did not need to do the whole routine MR. KIR does (you know without the HUGENESS of his fire trouble.) Amazing! Everyone else left and I finished putting out the fire and went inside with my kids.

A HUGONGOUS realization hit me. Mr. KIR's fires are scary and too big and I did not need "Mr. just returned from college, good looking, of no fire help, young man" to assist. I just needed to build a normal--not Mr. Kir-- type of fire.

So I officially decree: My fire fear Warpness is hereby removed!

Oh and, "Mr. just returned from college, good looking, of no fire help, young man" Thanks for coming to entertain the Laurels:)

Friday, April 24, 2009

Digging

Little Man use to LOVE Mr. KIR's shovel. He would drag it all over the yard "digging" holes and planting sticks and weeds and worms and on and on and on.... It is a big, bulky thing for him and seemed heavy, but he still loved it

If Mr. KIR needed to work outside, we just gave Little Man Daddy's shovel and he would work right along side him. If I took the kids outside to play, I would give the kid Dad's shovel and I could leisurely read and monitor his play time while reading from my comfy lawn chair. A perfect set up!

BUT NOW...Oh now, I have a bone to dig with the Easter Bunny! He/She thought that getting Little Man his own little, perfect for his size, real, shovel was a fantastic idea. I mean what would be better? Nothing-- The kid was gonna LOVE it!!!

See this little treasure...isn't it cute!
Here is Little Man posing after a long days work of digging while I read my book from my chair...thinking all was well in the world.: (and yes, he has on a Halloween shirt--it is his FAVORITE. And yes, he tucked it in..and yes he has cowboy boots on the wrong feet with the pants tucked in. He is a fashion conscious little guy...what is a mom suppose to do?)

See how perfect sized it is for him. See how dirty is it from play!!
And in honor of the LOVE and bone needed digging, I wrote a po-hem about our afternoon:

If a Dad plants grass and has a little boy
Don't give him a shovel to enjoy,
While mom is reading and sun basking,
Cause if you do you WILL be asking:

How many holes can a little boy dig
If a little boy can dig holes?

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Messiden

Little Man: "Mom, I need some mess-i-den. I can't get the sick out."

Me: (with raised eyebrows), "Hmmm."

Little Man: "Mom, I do, I am sick of soap."

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

School at home

Sweetums has been too sick to send to school, but not too sick to do school work. For three days, we have been doing school at home. She is a smart cookie, and I am an impatient moron. Apparently, home schooling is NOT for me!

Monday, April 13, 2009

Note to self

Remember that when I go shopping to buy little Easter trinkets to give to my nieces and nephews for Easter, and the Easter Bunny comes with me, I should not let him/her buy the same stuff for my kids baskets that I have purchased for the before mentioned nieces/nephews, as the questions that arise from my older offspring are fairly incriminating!

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Cooking lessons from the BEST!

This being Easter weekend, I decided to engage my offspring in a fond childhood memory of mine:
Easter Egg Roll Offs!
I have tried this in the past, but they were too young to fully grasp the concept. But now...Now, Pony Girl is 9 and Sweetums is 6. So I say, "Let the good time ROLL...or eggs...whatever."

After decorating eggs, you individually go through all your eggs, inspecting and getting a feel for each one. Then you pick your prized egg. You convince someone that they indeed want to eat an egg, as shells WILL be a flyin', and find a nice open area on the floor. The two competitors then sit a few spaces apart and proceed to roll their eggs toward one another. When the eggs hit, whomever's comes out unscathed--ROCKS!!! The competition continues until one egg is smooshed to smithereens and is pronounced the LOSER! The winners egg is then re veered as the BEST, and put away for safe keeping until the next competitor decides to fall. I am seriously NOT kidding when I say I. LOVED. THIS. when I was young.

Oh, I was beyond excited to begin this today with my girls!!! I got a dozen eggs and put them on the stove to boil. I then did my famous and ever popular, "leave the room while I am cooking" move, and went to the basement to srap.

Three hours later...YEP, 3 hours later Little Man says, "Mom, it stinks down here."
I simply think..."HoHoHo, he is such a boy."
Nope, I did not clue in.
I kept on a scrappin'...until I smelled something. I then began to panic! I BOLTED upstairs to see what Little Man had put in the toaster as I totally blamed him! (Such a good mom aren't I!!)

Did you know that boiling eggs for three hours and some odd minutes does not make for good Egg Rolling game practices? Did you know that when you boil eggs for three hours they BLOW to smithereens ALL OVER? Do you know what eggs look like after they have been boiling for three hours? or what my stove, counter tops, above the stove fan, or my favorite pan I salvaged from Ashley's goodwill pile looked like after I did it?? Did you know blown up, burned eggs smell up a house better than a caged skunk? Do you know that Mr. KIR is going to be much displeased with me when he reads this?


Well, now you do...

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Ahhhh

Holly to Little Man: What does "love" mean?

Little Man: "Mom."

Monday, March 30, 2009

Driving Skills run in the family

I am one of the worlds BEST drivers! Ask anyone...except my dad, who fixed many a crunched vehicle I once drove, or my husband, who knows everything I have ever hit dented or smooshed with the cars we currently own, or Holly and Justin, whose cars I have hit three times while they were parked in my drive way, or the young women I work with in church, who I have been told are "totally freaked out" when riding with me, or my friend Sandi who got stuck on a one lane overpass with me when I did not know how the heavens to get the vehicle to move, or my drivers ed teacher who only passed me with a "must drive with another licensed adult for 6 months and a 'C' " because my driving skills were still questionable. Other than those people...ask anyone... I am a great driver.

And so, having just returned from Texas where Little Man had the opportunity to test out HIS driving skills-- I am pleased to announce:

HE is taking after his momma....HEAVEN HELP US ALL!



Friday, March 27, 2009

High Achiever

Pony Girl: Mom, when I grow up I either want to be a veterinarian...or work at McDonald's....I can't decide.


Tough choice...Toooooough choice!

Monday, March 23, 2009

Pathway to

Our hallway was sporting this new look:

So I followed the trail and found this:



Turns out...toilet papering isn't just for the great outdoors anymore!

Monday, March 9, 2009

Plaster of Paris Plunder

Last Friday I got a call from Pony Girl's student teacher asking if she sent home some Plaster of Paris with PG, if I would be willing to make a mold of the planets for the class with her over the weekend. I of course said yes..I mean I am a perfect parent like that.

When PG got off the bus with this HUGE container

I will admit I was perplexed. I mean how big were these molds?

I got a bit more perplexed....alright, worried, when I opened up the mold kit and saw that the molds were little and the instructions said this:
What? MORE plaster if I NEEDED?

I had

Do you see that? 8 POUNDS OF DRY PLASTER!

I immediately called the teacher. However, it was Friday, a student teacher--meaning a college student--and 4:00pm in the afternoon. She did not answer. I left a message asking her how many kits exactly did she need, because I was pretty sure I was confused.

I made one kit hoping that was all I needed to do...knowing I was dreaming.
A few hours later, I noticed we had a message from the teacher. She stated that she was sorry if she confused me, she needed 50. That's it.

WHAT? 50? I was freaked. Once you make the plaster and stick it in the molds, it takes about 45 minutes to set up enough to pop it out of the mold without breaking it--especially Saturn. (I tell ya...those rings and I were not friends when this event was over.)

SO, I quickly informed PG of our plunder and made another kit--she was finished helping me by this time as a wild, ferocious, get this junk done, look had infiltrated my eyes.

As I whipped up the next batch, I did the math in my head..as I am a MATH whiz, and came to the conclusion that I was in a MESS! There was NO way I was going to be able to leave this plaster making site if I was to get 50 done over the weekend.

I will admit that here I got a bit ticked at the teacher. WHY did she wait until the exact weekend to have ONE mother do 50 kits? AND 50? WHY in the name of all things great? There were only 20 kids in PG's class!!!

I called, got her machine again, and left a frantic, although very nice, message about time--and Saturn's rings--and 50--and holy cow.

I just kept making and making...and cussing Saturn as the stupid rings crumbled if I just looked there way.

Later that night, I was plastered out! I had 4 of some planets made, three of others, and only one Saturn. I had a fresh batch in the molds by the time the teacher got back in touch with me. When I answered, she was giggling

GIGGLING! UMMMM, excuse me little college girl...I am not laughing with you!!

She then mentioned again how sorry she was for the confusion...the "more plaster if needed" comment was from last year when they only had a small bag of plaster AND-- AND--they only needed 50 planets total...so 5 kits total.

AHHHH, 50 individual planets... two very important words she left out!!

I am thinking "communication with parents" may be a good weekend class to offer...

Anyway, here are the finished projects...PG was so excited, she could not wait to carry them into the classroom... Me too--GOOD RIDDANCE Planets!


Sunday, March 1, 2009

Meth

Mr. KIR and I have some good friends (Kent and Charyce) who have 5 children~two of which are adopted. Their story is amazing and I am humbled by the struggles and joys they have encountered by joining these little ones into their family. The two girls were adopted separately, 14 months apart...with one of their biological children born in the middle of this time period. However, they are full blood sisters who were taken from their parents for drug abuse.

A few years ago Charyce entered a commercial making contest on speaking out against drug use. She won! I love the commercial and have recently taken siege upon the only copy she owns. Here is their little sunshine being the star she is:


video

Friday, February 27, 2009

Potty Mouth

Hilarious conversation in car yesterday:

Little Man: "Poop, Pee, Poop and Pee. Boogers. Poop, Poop, Poop."

Me: "LM, please don't say those potty words. We only use nice words."

LM: "Mom, are potty words bad words?"

Me: "Yes"

LM: "I don't say bad words. Pony Girl doesn't say bad words. Sweetums doesn't say bad words. Mom doesn't say bad words...but Dad, now he says bad words. I am going to have to wash his mouth out with soap because he says bad words all the time."

Me: giggle giggle chuckle "Hmmmm, you don't and I don't but dad does?"

LM: "Yep, Dad says potty words and bad words and potty words. He needs soap in his mouth"

WHY would I giggle at such a sad realization from my three year old? Because it is SO not true. I can honestly say with 100% positiveness that the kids have NEVER heard Mr. KIR say a bad word in their lives. Me on the other hand....wellllll let's just leave that one unanswered shall we!

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Free Bracelet

Company is coming. So, I got myself a new bracelet. I did not plan on getting a new bracelet. It was free...just a bonus for all my hard work and preparations.

Wanna see it?

As I said, free ...after a bazillion dollar deductible!

You can get one too, just grab an arm full of recycling, sheets, and an air mattress. Head down the stairs making sure you have slippery socks on, can't see where you are going, or have a hand to hang onto the hand rail. Then go for it...TRIP away!

I also got this:


A sprained foot. Later, after I had fallen, I had to go to the doctor for something totally unrelated and he mentioned my "gimpness." I told him of my "trip" and he wanted to take a look. He informed me it looked more like a brake than a sprain and recommended an x-ray--(hence the bracelet.) He said when you break a toe here:


It is no big deal. They just tape the toes together and let it heal,
but if you break it here:



That is bad. It can cause chronic pain and needs to be check out by a podiatrist. UGH! (can you see the bend marks from where it bent? I am talking OUCH!--plus it is swollen..not that you can tell in the picture...but trust me--swollen!) Luckily mine is only a sprain.

So if company is coming your way, or you just feel like a bit o' pampering, SLIP into a bracelet like mine!